Most-Rejected Farm Wife Valentine Gifts

Husker Home Place

I have under strong advisement from my wife that these Valentine gift ideas send the wrong message.

Published on: February 10, 2011

I have under strong advisement from my wife that these farm wife Valentine gift ideas send the wrong message.

February is a time for romance, when farmers turn to their wives on the morning of St. Valentine’s Day, gaze longingly into their eyes and whisper sweet nothings like, “You gonna get up and help me with chores or what?”

In many households, there won’t be a heart-shaped box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day. Some farmers probably don’t  “do” Valentine’s Day. But if you did, I have under the strongest advisement from my own wife that you should avoid some of these “most rejected” but quite practical farm wife Valentine’s gifts.

1)       I know a brand new pliers and holster would seem like the perfect gift. But your spouse might disagree.

2)       There’s always duct tape, the handyman or handywoman’s best friend, but that might backfire too.

3)       A recycled, plastic five-gallon chore bucket, freshly power-washed should be the perfect gift, but maybe go with a nicer, metallic model.

4)       Of course nothing says, “I love you” in my mind quite like a beautiful, shiny, sparkling, expensive, handcrafted, silver-colored new scoop shovel, but I guess you might be sending the wrong message.

5)       You could try really surprising your spouse by shaving and showering, you know, whether you need it or not. She might react with some real sensual comments like, “Wow, I didn’t know you had a chin!” or “There really are hands under all that grease.”

6)       Or try taking her out to one of those fancy restaurants and actually go inside and sit down to eat instead of going through the drive-through window like you usually do.

7)       You can show your unending love by preparing a good, home cooked meal yourself, with all the fixings for your spouse. If you opt for peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, go all out and buy that brand name peanut butter instead of plain label. If you really want to impress, and you decide to go with hot dogs, try offering some of that snooty mustard. That kind of stuff shows real class.

OK, maybe I’ve seen way too many Red Green reruns. On the serious side, as a farmer myself, I know that we often get caught up in farm work and sometimes forget what is really important. And I also know that farming is not gender-specific, so often enough, the farmer is a woman and the farm spouse happens to be a man.

In any case, it’s a good time for all of us to let our spouses know that we appreciate their assistance when the cows are running wild down the road, when they sacrifice something they want so we can afford to fix the pickup or when they work by our side every day or away from the farm as so many do, to help make ends meet.

I would encourage farmers to give their spouses and children – their team on the family farm – one important gift that only they can give. Tell your family and show your family how much you love them.

And remember if you’re out looking for gifts for your spouse, skip the scoop shovel and go for the chocolates. You’ll thank me later.

Happy St. Valentine’s Day.