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Farmer Iron

A little humor as the weather turns our hearts and minds to the field.

Published on: April 1, 2010

I know for North Dakota readers there's probably little humor in harvesting corn in March and early April - although given our natural penchant for dark humor I'm sure there are some laughs to be had even from this delayed harvest.

The April 1 on the calendar gives a person pause. This is a time of practical jokes - although in journalism you have to be careful. There are a lot of stories about career-ending jokes that ended up in print because some writer or copy editor wasn't paying attention and a joke story in the newsroom actually ended up on a reader's doorstep.

With that caveat, however, what follows is a little fun - if you're a registered user you can join in with your own ideas too. What follows is a little crooked look at farm and machinery news...my take on some industry humor.

Resistant Weeds so Bad Farmers on Cultivator Hunt
While reluctant, growers turn to iron as best choice to stop herbicide resistant weeds...used plow prices skyrocket.

Auto-Steering, Texting While Driving Laws Converge
Farmer arrested while texting in tractor cab when state highway patrol sees operator running auto-guidance and texting at same time. Tells farmer 'hands on the wheel!'.

Farm Bill to be Reset Annually
Congress feels food policy too important to hold off making changes only every five years - moves toward annual reset.

HSUS Turns Cruelty Approach in New Direction
Looking at the hours farmers work, organization figures out that animals treated better than humans in agriculture. Works toward tougher labor laws instead. Again...not realistic.

Farmers Turn Engine Tech on its Head
Farmer tinkering in new tractor finds that entering a simple code in virtual terminal gives him access to company's credit account.

Broadband Band Internet to be Free on the Farm
USDA figures out that if they invest in WiMax they can save billions in postage and check writing using electronics. Idea comes from Google.

OK, so that last one is more wishful thinking than anything else. But, hey, it could happen.